Remember Jebat?

I often wonder what the Malays would be like today if Jebat had won instead of Tuah. A cynical friend said, it wouldn’t have made a difference even if Jebat did win because history would have been rewritten in favour of Tuah anyway as being more politically correct. Loyalty to a ruler, however irrational and despotic, have always been a trademark of Malaysians or is it just Malays?  Blind, unquestioning loyalty is essential in preserving the status quo of the ruling elite.

But I digress – what if Jebat had won and /or was reported as such? After all history is written by the victors and if Jebat was victorious, it only stands to reason that he would make sure his victory over Tuah was known to all, far and wide to prove his point that injustice is unacceptable and the Sultan is unfit to rule. (Let’s not go into the nitty gritty of Jebat’s supposed actions and killings of court maidens which always seemed fishy to me. ..)  Better still what if they both stood up against Sultan Mahmud, and garnered the support of the Bendahara and the people? Maybe when the Sultan realised he was outgunned , outnumbered and definitely out of power  – he went  into exile. What then would the Malays be like?

Perhaps, they would have been more discriminating and stringent in  choice of leaders.  Loyalty would come only after leaders show  their readiness to be held accountable for their behavior and actions and demonstrate integrity, courage and an unstinting , unwavering commitment to the preserving the interests of the rakyat, regardless of race, religion and state of pocketbook. Such Malays would voice their disagreement and protests vociferously at policies or the lack of it to safeguard Malaysia’s interests. They would haul up the corrupt, not vote them in repeatedly. These Malays would be open-minded, tolerant and generous with all who choose to make Malaysia their home. After all the first Malays to beoame Muslim chose to do so  after witnessing the characteristics and experiencing the warmth of the Muslims from Pasai. These characteristics would then be reinforced as part of the national culture and consciousness.   Narrowmindedness and an obsessive compulsion to target women and emphasise rituals over values would not be in the vocabulary of such Malays.

A high premium  would be placed on integrity, excellence, tolerance and cooperation and Malays will be fiercely loyal to Malaysia and guard our interests and resources jealously. Malay leaders who do not make this grade, do not even get a nose through a crack, much less control or influence others. We would find Malay intellectuals,  academics, journalists , industrialists,  artists ,  writers and  directors competing comfortably on the world stage. The Malaysian education system would produce thinkers and doers that help propel Malaysia into the future,  not conformists and future supporters to maintain the status quo.

Is this stuff that dreams are made of? Can this be anything other than rhetoric and empty words?

When Tuah purportedly killed Jebat for being disloyal to the Sultan, even if Jebat’s intention was to avenge Tuah’s  unjust ‘death’, the message that reverberated for Malays in generations to come was that loyalty to the one in power must be unswerving and unquestioning, under any circumstances. They must live in hope that errant leaders will come around and correct damage wrought. They must continue to have faith in a flawed system that allows  leaders to implement policies that undercut and undermine the very institutions and people they were entrusted to preserve and protect. They should close their eyes to the root causes and main perpetrators of corruption amongst them for Malays do not rock the boat for change, even when the boat is visibly heading towards the rocks. They have to close ranks and remain loyal to their leaders especially when they receive favours and boons. ‘ We are obliged to follow and remain loyal for to be disloyal would mean jeopardising the future of the Malays and risk the loss of Malay political power’. So in the interest supposedly for the greater good, Malays remain loyal to flawed leaders and flawed systems.  Tuah made the choice that fateful day to remain loyal to a man who ordered his death on a whim and a rumour and kill his best friend as proof of that loyalty and belief in  the credibility of the Sultanate. Just as the Malays do today. Any possibility for change lies in the realization among the Malays that they are the ones who hold the balance of power in this country and therefore must exercise it responsibly – not just for themselves but for future generations.  If they persist in ignoring this responsibility ostrich-like, Malays may end in in a country depleted of resources,  weakened economically and mismanaged only to share it with the non-Malays who are too impoverished to migrate. For change to happen,  we Malays must be bold and strong enough to demand integrity and accountability of our leaders. If we don’t then  we will continue to get what we deserve  by our continued silence and loyalty to those who do not deserve it.

If anyone asks you, what can one man do, remind them of Tuah and Jebat.

The State of Muslim Marriages

I met a friend today who was uncertain as to her options as her husband has literally been badgering her for permission to take a second wife. He would alternate between showering her with gifts, promises of fidelity then followed by a litany of how dissatisfied he is with her and why he wants a second wife. They have been married for 25 years with four children and are both employed in a GLC. Upper-middle class Muslim couple who married for love while studying, came back with degrees and a young child to a recession and no jobs. They enrolled in the government scheme for unemployed graduates and became temporary teachers working for RM660 a month. Through hard work and grit (the wife sold artificial flower arrangements among other things), they managed to move from the temporary jobs and rooms in relatives’ homes to a comfortable home and settled down to follow the normal pattern of life for middle-aged Muslim couples; go for Haj, see their children through the various exams , then university and make the gradual climb up the corporate ladder; though more for the husband then the wife of course; saving money for their children’s weddings and eventual pension. In the meantime, attending the mosque, usrahs, ceramahs regularly will be part of their routine, after all that’s preparation for the afterlife. The only spanner in the works at this point in time is the husband’s insistence on taking a second wife as its his right to do so as a Muslim man.  The sad thing about this story is that it is an all too common occurence in many Muslim families in Malaysia today. Just take a circle of friends and acquaintances and note how many marriages have faced this problem just within one’s own circle. A good monogamous marriage may be slowly becoming an anomaly.

Between 1995 and 2004, government statistics show that 13,516 polygamous marriages took place  representing 1.4 percent of all Muslim marriages. Not only are these statistics outdated , many second and third marriages go unregistered plus the absence of a national database precludes the possibility coming up with an accurate number of polygamous marriages. While some Muslim men like to quote the argument of “extraordinary” men who have the capacity to take care of multiple families, I think it takes a truly extraordinary man to nurture and sustain  the spritual, emotional and financial well-being of one family.  Muslim men who would like to ‘avoid adultery’ and experience  the variety  of “a different dish” (common rationalizations for polygamy) would do well to consider the results of a pilot study conducted by Sisters In Islam where in 2005 involving 40 members of polygamous households revealed that some children suffer emotional problems as a direct consequence of the practice, causing them to take up alcohol and smoking. The 12 year old child of the family mentioned earlier currently suffers from crying jags and depression and has spoken to the school counselor about the friction between her parents due to her father’s request as a way to cope with her father’s need to be polygamous. 

The position of polygamy in Islam has been explained in various articles including one by Dr Sharifah Munirah Alatas http://www.muslimedia.com/archives/features98/polygamy.htm     Verse 4:129, which states, “You are never able to be fair and just as between women, even if it is your ardent desire,” recognizes the impossibility of men treating all their wives equally and justly, the basis for  countries like Tunisia outlawing polygamy. But many men like to refer instead to the verse which comes after “and so, do not allow yourselves to incline towards one to the exclusion of the other, leaving her in a state of having and not having a husband…” (al-Nisa, 4: 129) as a justification for polygamy as long as they strive to be fair.

 It is strange and hurtful for me to see Muslims falling over themselves to justify their right to hurt the women they love, whom they call wives, who bore their children and stayed with them through want and ease, by insisting on exercising their right to marry another woman, especially once their first wives have passed the bloom of youth and entering middle-age.  They conveniently forget the the Prophet (pbuh) married only after his first wife Siti Khadija died and insisted that his son-in-law Ali, should not take a second wife for that would hurt his daughter Fatima. This should be a clear indicator as to the Prophet’s true feelings about polygamy even though it is permitted in Islam.

Isn’t life whether you are a Muslim or not, lived for the pleasure of the One God, to be blessed and nourished in His love for us? If we hurt the ones we love in order to fulfil a selfish need, isn’t that going against our covenant with Him. Of course this line of argument would not hold water with those who are truly determined to fulfil their needs even to the point of saying that “this would help the widows, divorcees and orphans out there for there are more women than men in Malaysia, right?”. If that is so then why are the prime candidates for second and third wives , younger, financially independent or able and usually more beautiful? Rarely the middle-aged widows or divorcees in need of financial aid. Which leads us to the hypocrisy of that particular argument especially as my friend’s husband wants to marry “a childless divorcee” because he no longer wants children. The idea of milk bottles, diapers and pushing prams is no longer his cup of tea hence “childless”. So women who marry other people’s husbands must be prepared to sacrifice their own dreams of motherhood. Anyway one looks at it, women are definitely getting the short end of the stick.

 ”As the late Isma`il Ragi al-Faruqi had once said “scripture itself, as well as the example of the Prophet, are not authoritative unless the subject has himself found them so on their own intrinsic merits. Any Muslim doing otherwise would have achieved islam, but not iman (piety and wisdom), whereas Islamic excellence consists of an islam resulting from and following upon iman. In the former case, islam is intellectually passive; in the latter, it is an active search for ways and means of actualizing the truths grasped in iman. http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Afaiz/afaiz3.htm

Being Muslim should mean that we are able to look at the truths inherent in the teachings of the Holy Quran and the examples of the Prophet (pbuh) and internalise these truths in our daily lives and not subvert them to rationalise intrinsically selfish needs that can be achieved at the expense of wives and children. Surely there is more to being a Muslim man, father and husband than just providing material sustenance. And in the case of husbands in polygamous marriages or who have divorced their wives due to the need for multiple partners, even material sustenance is suspect and often obtained at the point of a smoking barrel in the form of court documents and rulings.

Muslim men must accept the reponsibility of being role models to their sons and daughters and true husbands to their wives. When children grow up disillusioned about their father, their first hero; it is a hard struggle for them to become mature, responsible adults who are not cynical about human relationships and are healthy not just in body, but mind and spirit. It takes a a remarkable woman to forgive the husband, accept the new woman and remain his wife in every sense of the word. But then that would be an extension of the ‘extraordinary man’ argument applied the other way round.

 When a wife consents to share her husband, a part of the love she feels for him will be lost forever, for only then will sharing be possible. Just ask any man whose wife has been unfaithful to him and ask whether he would still want her while she maintains a relationship with another man. Or would he want to kill the lover and put him in a septic tank instead? Since when does the need for exclusivity  in a relationship only apply to men? Since when was kindness to one’s wife an unneccessary feature for a husband? Why don’t men realise that asking for permission for a second or subsequent wife negates all that they have shared together and renders the wife valueless?

Polygamy is not the choice of a Thinking Muslim man.

Dear John,

I was at first inclined to answer your comments on each point raised from your views that the Malays stole Malaysia from the Orang Asli and that Islam is ’fascist’ among other things. But considering that some of the comments made were offensive and provocative, I thought a generic approach would be more constructive. First of all, I’m Pro-Malaysia. Who I vote for in whatever circumstances, is something I feel is unneccessary  to advertise. The fact that you asked about both my religious and political beliefs tells me that I have succeeded in presenting  my views objectively enough to preclude identifiable political and religious beliefs. Too many decisions have been made and opinions given that were so obviously colored that the facts of the matter were effectively obscured.

Fact of the matter is that whether we can turn back time or not, we have to admit the reality that Malaysia is a multi-racial country. This means that at no time in the near future, is Malaysia likely to become a Islamic nation governed by the Syariah Law. We are not going to convert all non-Muslims to Islam and neither are all Muslims going to become apostates.  At the same time,   actions taken in the name of Islam (like looking for lovers in all the wrong places for a living) or hijacking the deceased in order to bury them the Muslim way (just in case they became Muslims at the last minute) , which may seem misguided to some and righteous to others – should not be equated with Islam the religion – just as the Inquisition should not be equated to Christianity and the continued oppression of the Palestinians  to Judaism.

Throughout the history of man terrible things have been committed  and continue to be committed in the name of religion be it Judaism, Christianity , Islam or other religions. We have to remain objective and separate the religion from the actions. Our spiritual health depends on it, for venom and contempt for others corrodes our faith.

Malaysians have to learn to live and work together whether they like it or not. Some may choose to be in racially distinct enclaves in terms of  where they live, work and study. Choose friends of their own race and socialise within their circle and avoid close contact or intimacy with the ‘others’. Look around us and see how many have succeeded in doing so and lived perfectly content lives.  But in doing so, all of us actually lose out on a much richer life experience  plus we continue to perpetuate racial polarisation, through lack of knowledge and understanding. 

No policy is going to integrate and unite Malaysians, however glamorous the campaigns and spokepersons -   unless and until we stop looking at each other as of different races but rather as just people who want the same things – a decent living, food, shelter, happiness, health , safety and a future for their children. And oh, courtesy for fellow Malaysians and fellow man, among others.

Mothers

Mothers aren’t the most comfortable of people to be around. Somehow, they have this gift of seeing right through carefully prepared reasons/rationale / justifications that we have for not doing or doing something important in our lives.

 A sharp glance, a piercing look that says “You’ve got to be joking! That won’t wash with me after all I gave birth to you and with that came this God-given  gift of cutting through the nonsense /half-truths /lame excuses that you are dishing out to me” .

We gird our loins in preparation; sift through possible cracks in our story and tell ourselves firmly that we are not going to say anything about that topic –-  after all we are adults and should be able to handle our problems at school/university/work/relationships with boyfriend /husband/ son/daughter -  only to find when we are face to face with her, that all that was for naught and we end up admitting to our insecurities and fears – carefully-built defences in tatters.

Through the extra salt they have partaken, their wisdom allows us to clarify our thoughts, shed our defence mechanisms and painfully admit the truth to ourselves, which may be any one of the following:

“ It is my fear of failure that holds me back from trying and for shooting myself in the foot”

“ There is no future in that relationship and I hate it that she was right!”

“ I should have been at home more and paid attention to what he/she was doing”

“ It is my fault for procrastinating starting the project/studying for the exam/sending in that application and now its too late”

The most painful truth of all :” I have no one else to blame (however much I want to – after searching desperately high and low for a convenient scapegoat) but MYSELF for this situation”

At the same time, mothers go around with pins that deflate our balloons of  pseudo-confidence. Just when you thought it was safe to step out of your shell and into the world with style,  ‘pop’ goes one of our balloons ..Just a simple remark from the mother of a news reader “ that suit was the wrong colour for you” would be enough for you to cringe, “ I must have looked awful”, however professional you may have sounded and looked to the multitude of viewers – after all, your mother’s opinion was what matters most. Perhaps not to all well-adjusted professionals out there who have learnt to take their mother’s opinions with more than a pinch of salt!

Conversely, there are mothers out there who shore up their children’s confidence in their abilities however unrealistically (judging from the horrific auditions for singing competitions in the US and good old Malaysia). Perhaps, their lack of judgement of their children’s true ability are clouded by unfulfilled dreams and wishful thinking of the indiscriminating taste of the voting audience. Thankfully, there are level-headed mothers out there who know when to push, when to hold back, when to hug, when to praise and when keep the pin behind their back, even though the temptation may be great.   

I don’t know how good a mother I am, no, that’s not exactly true – I’m a great cheerleader for my children’s achievements, to the point of embarrassing them sometimes. But when they do not do their best, I do find it hard to hide my disappointment and that maybe that makes me a bad mother.My children think my disappointment stem from the high expectations I have of them – which at certain times they are unable to fulfil . When they don’t seem to realize is that as a mother, it hurts to see your children face the painful reality of life whether it is weaker grades than they had hoped for, missed project deadlines, annoyed lecturers/teachers, errant fathers, selfish girlfriends, jealous boyfriends and worse of all, an uncertain future – anything in fact that causes them to be unhappy.

I feel their hurt, confusion and pain and want so much to make it better. They are too old for me to kiss the hurt away and hug and rock them till they stop crying. They are almost adults – or perhaps it is because they are old enough to deal with all this on their own that my pain is greater. It isn’t because I don’t feel needed – it is because they have to come to this realisation by themselves . In order to become an adult and participate in life – they have to do it on their own. And I have to let go.

To all the mothers out there, my comrade in arms, let us take comfort from the fact that our children did after all learn the basics from us – to the best of their abilities. Where they go from that point – we cannot follow. What we can do is make the hard decisions when they falter – to tell them the truth and help them face themselves and support them with love and belief in their abilities. Pray that they will learn from the hard knocks in life as well as not take for granted the blessings they experience every day. The greatest favour a mother can do for her child is to look them in the eye and unflinchingly tell them what they need to know in order to take the next step. Sometimes, it’s the truth, sometimes it is not. O for the wisdom to know the difference , to say it the right way or to just be there for them.

26 March 2007

31 August – A Day To Remember

A Malaysian flag billowing in the wind of a deserted courtyard of a mission school in a sleepy town. Other smaller flags on cars, flutter like the small flags strung on a string around the school. Another stretches in the middle of a government buildingo , too small to go all the way across. On television, a Malay drama attempts unsuccessfully to examine the life of a family through the eyes of a young boy – the New Malay after 49 years of independence. A series of articles in the media and advertisements strive to remind us to look beyond the flags, to the people who fought for our independence, to look at what we have accomplished and value our country. All this, a week before the 31^st of August, Malaysia’s day of independence.

Sixty years ago, a 15 year old boy joined group of young men gathered at a field in the sleepy town on the East Coast to protest the Malayan Union. Years later, the same young man would be among those who joined Tunku Abdul Rahman to cry “Merdeka”. As the editor of “Suara Merdeka”, UMNO’s voice in the early years, he played an important role in the formative years of our young country in unifying the Malays during an era where the pen was indeed mighty. All his life he fought to make our lot in life better than his, and our country better than what it was when he was growing up.He was my father and it is his spirit that I remember most when 31^st August dawns.

It is a unique country we live in, so rich in many ways, so much to offer those lucky enough to live within its borders and beyond it as well. For those who felt that our shortcomings were enough to drive them from our shores, I know that they will return – sooner or later for this will always be their home. A country where nasi lemak, roti canai and kuey teow goreng (among others) reign supreme signifying strangely the point where all races meet – food! After 50 years of independence, racial stereotypes and polarisation still exist but where food is concerned, there are no boundaries of colour or creed (except the “halal” certification.)

The Malaysian tongue is Malay and English a strong second, sometimes first among the upper middle-class and either a second or foreign language among the rest of society. Where food unites us, language divides us – not that we don’t understand English or Malay when spoken or written but the inability to use either language well becomes a sore point and often wielded as example of how patriotic or unpatriotic a Malaysian is. It is sad that a lack of basic Chinese and Tamil is acceptable and normal in a multiracial society like Malaysia. In countries like the USA (I know this wouldn’t be a popular example, but there are some things they do right), learning Spanish is considered important in order to communicate with Hispanics which make up a sizable number in certain states. We should use each other’s language interchangeably in order to feel more Malaysian perhaps even to become more Malaysian. When a foreigner learns the Malay language, we feel gratified. Imagine the goodwill we build when we learn the language our neighbours and friends speak. In that way too, we learn to be more tolerant of the struggle many go through to learn English when they regard it as a foreign language.

Religion is very much a part of being Malaysian and we have a age-old tradition for religious tolerance as exemplified by Unity Street in Melaka and festivals that we celebrate together. Nowadays though, religion is a touchy subject what with Article 11 being lobbed back and forth like a tennis ball by groups decrying its shortcomings or using it as a platform. The freedom to practise one’s religion is in our country is both a right and a privilege that is not common in every country of the world. The government walks a fine line between preserving the rights of Muslims and non-Muslims alike to practise what they believe in while ensuring that the integrity of the official religion of the country is not impugned in any way, whether by those with deviant beliefs or those who preach to Muslims. The strange thing about this issue is that for those who give fiery speeches about how fellow Muslims should treat apostates, do they ask themselves why do people leave Islam? How effective is our system whether at community, district, state or federal level in teaching born Muslims what Islam is all about? Do Muslim communities have a support system that extends outside the family that is able to help fellow Muslims whether they are lost or found, born Muslim , born again Muslims or new Muslims?

As Muslims, we are told to examine ourselves all the time (muhasabah) in order to learn and improve ourselves. In dealing with a potentially explosive and extremely thorny issue, have Muslims examined themselves especially how they treat those who are different or those who have strayed? How have they contributed to the well-being of others be it Muslim or non-Muslim?

Let us not even begin to look into the policies, the heavily theoretical religious education curriculum and the money spent on preaching to the converted. The persistent discriminatory slant against women in terms of policies and an over-emphasis on the ritualistic aspect of Islam over the spiritual understanding of its wisdom by certain parties have alienated many. Apostasy is a symptom, not the disease. Any doctor worth his or her salt will treat the patient’s disease as indicated by the symptom. As Malaysians, we should not allow anyone to politicise this potentially explosive issue to divide us. Instead we should draw upon our tradition of tolerance and learn from other Muslim communities all over the world how best to deal with individuals who have left the religion. That after all is what we do best, look at what others have done, study the research (in this case the Quran, Hadith and Sunnah) thoroughly and come up with our own approach.

We Malaysians whether we would like to admit it or nor share common universal and typically Asian values; filial piety, respect and deference to elders, close community and familial ties, integrity and compassion among others. When these values are eroded, our society weakens. Our youth lose direction and ambition, their parents forget to lead, our leaders espouse the obvious yet contribute by their inaction to the rot that is seeping through this country. It’s a malaise that saps our spirit and momentum to strive ahead. Short-term gains are preferred to long-term constructive policies that require thought and effort. Wisdom is in short supply.

Malaysians of vision, I salute you for having the strength and stamina to realise your dreams; whether it is a vision of a better life – financial independence, freedom to travel, a dream house ( the typical multi-level marketing dreams) for we live in a country that is peaceful and bountiful and dreams when backed by determination and sweat, more often than not, can come true. There are the sounds of either birds chirping or the ‘suratkhabar lama’ call to greet us when we wake up, depending upon whether you are an early bird or laze in bed type. Not the sound of gunfire and mortar or army boots outside your door, like what others have to live with. Our children grow up replete, fed on a diet of KFC, nasi lemak , entertained by their CN and sighing over endless tuition classes they dutifully go to. Classrooms without walls, queuing up for food and clean water amid the dust and drabness of a refugee camp, seeing friends and family shot and killed in front of their eyes is not their lot in life.

Adversity builds strength of character – so a cliché goes. Are we then to deprive our children or ourselves in order to build character? Malaysians have it easy, so easy that we forget to be polite and considerate to our nearest and dearest even much less strangers. We have to be reminded to be clean and hygienic, to take our children across the road ourselves, to be safe drivers, to be honest and not fleece unsuspecting tourists, to smile – We have to be reminded of the obvious through endless, expensive campaigns for we have forgotten how to be true Malaysians.

Who are they, this disappearing breed of True Malaysians?

The Malaysian women who 49 years ago thought nothing of giving away jewellery off their wrists to finance the trip to London to negotiate our independence.

The Chinese policeman who put his life on the line and more often than not paid for it with his life by working Special Branch during the Emergency

The Malay civil servants who struggled to build establish current national institutions and systems with very little resources, much thought and wisdom plus a whole lot of heart

The armed forces who ‘masuk hutan’ to keep our borders safe, risking and losing life and limb – unsung heroes who gave us the peace we enjoy today

The early leaders of all races, whether at national or grassroots level who fought to unite us through endless rallies, meetings, compromising ego and spending their own money to make people believe that Malaysia can exist, survive and flourish, even if we did not have the resources to produce a simple needle

The people who looked beyond race to save lives of neighbours, friends and strangers during that dark period of our nation’s history – 13 May 1969

The teachers who served in all circumstances whether small kampungs without running water and electricity, or estates with students of all ages in one class to educate the leaders of today

The list of true Malaysians is endless if we take from the past and present. If we are not careful, there may not be any left for the future for it seems they are an endangered species…

Let us take a good hard look at ourselves, our children, our family and friends. In this life that we lead courtesy of the Almighty, we ask ourselves what can we do to be a better person, a better Malaysian who can help move this country we love out of a turbulent yet indulgent adolescence into a responsible, nurturing adulthood (in country years). Selflessness, tolerance, integrity, strength and wisdom are components of the true Malaysian’s character. Let us build upon our strengths, rectify our flaws and stop being self-indulgent. We should remember our heroes past and present and nurture the minds, hearts and spirits of our youth for they will receive our legacy. Only when we have the clarity of vision and courage to make hard decisions, carry through and maintain the momentum of change, will we be able to be in the same league economically and socially with other countries within ASEAN borders and beyond. Let us not be remembered as a country that ‘could have been great if only…’

After the fact

I panicked tonight when I had to leave my son alone at home. I was on the highway when the feeling of unease I had felt all night threatened to overwhelm me and I felt like I had to turn back. I managed to swallow the panic and saw my errand through. After all, it wasn’t like he’s a child.. being almost eighteen qualifies him for almost adulthood. It was the news of the break in at my aunt’s house (KB);the burglary at my boss’s house (USJ) and the robbery in Section 5 where the owner, the ex police chief, succumbed to injuries after fighting with the robbers, protecting his family; the robbery in Subang Parade, let’s not mention the robbers who assaulted two strapping young men in their own home… a whole litany of incidents in my neighbourhood, in my hometown; places I’ve always felt were safe before. Is this the price we pay to live our lives the way we want to? Why is it we cannot depend on the police to protect us? Crimes it seems cannot be anticipated, predicted and sometimes perhaps not even solved or prosecuted. Have we lost our focus as a society when the mechanisms designed to protect victims and prosecute the perpetrators seem to be impotent? We react after the fact – deaths have an impact unlike assaults – predictable indignation, expressions of regret, exhotations for change then selective amnesia sets in.. and we conveniently forget yet again..

The man who died as a result of the robbery of his home lived a life of honour, courage and integrity. There was another man who died a a couple of years ago when he came to the aid of a snatch theft victim. Will their deaths change this climate of fear we live in today? Amid the sunny news of a reviving economy, smiling tourists and high tech toilets some may say ” a climate of fear” is an exaggeration and the rising crime rate is normal even debatable (I’m sure statistics can be found to prove otherwise) for a rapidly developing country like Malaysia.

I live in a house with an alarm system in an upper middle-class neighbourhood. A dead body was found in the playground behind my house,  a boy  was assaulted and the neighbour’s dog poisoned and the house ransacked; all within a radius of less than 1 km from my house.  Neighbourhood associations hire their own security guards and we are no exception. I’m not paranoid but is it too much to ask to feel safe in one’s own home in a neighbourhood like USJ Subang Jaya? Perhaps it’s too much to ask , after all it seems even VIP’s are not safe in Putrajaya. If we live in relative insecurity, how do others feel in other neighbourhoods?

Must it be like the water we pay for to use yet is undrinkable unless we treat it and filter it at our own expense? Our security must be our own responsibility – privatised and outsourced.. Is it because the authorities feel we have the means and can afford it like we can afford the toll hikes? Or is it just that our police departments have other fish to fry… road blocks to check drivers using handphones, lovers in isolated spots…  patroling neighbourhoods doesn’t seem to be on the agenda. So do we continue to live in fear?